Case. One partner keeps returning to the other’s past relationships, seeking comparisons and reassurance.
Model. A legacy bug: old code (insecurity) runs in a new system. The past can’t be deleted, but it shouldn’t hold admin rights over the present.
What helped. They separated “the fact of the past” from “the fear of the present” — working with the need for safety, not with the exes.
Lesson. The past can’t be rewritten, but it can be stripped of control over the present.
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